May 29, 2016

Chocolate Ice Cream at 5am Fixes Everything..


























Who decided 'breakfast foods' should be bacon and eggs anyway? Or toast or oatmeal.
Why can't it be seen as 'normal' to have spaghetti or pizza for breakfast?

Well, I'm currently eating that delicious bowl of chocolate ice cream for breakfast and you know what? It feels pretty damn good.

I've been having a rough time sleeping lately. Just uncomfortable, needing to pee every hour and what not. I'm also a day passed my due date and really not looking forward to being induced if this baby decides they're too cozy up in here and don't want to come out on their own.

If I were being fed chocolate ice cream at 5am I'd probably stay tucked away in there too. Smart baby.

But those aren't the reasons why I woke up at 4:30 and needed some comfort food.

I've touched on my anxiety on here before and how sometimes it gets a little too overwhelming for me. What you all don't know is that I've always, for as long as I can remember, had this crippling fear. For some reason I've always felt like I couldn't have babies on my own because I would die giving birth. Trust me, I know how crazy I sound.

But its always been there- since I was young. I told my family members over and over that I would be adopting any children I have. It wasn't until these past few years that I started considering having my own and well, here I am now. One day passed my due date feeling scared and happy and every-freakin'-emotion you can imagine.

It just hits me randomly sometimes. Like this morning. I woke up at 4:30, needing to pee, and as I lay back down trying to go back to sleep the thought hit me. I'm going to die soon. Every scenario in which I could die while giving birth ran through my head at that moment. I started panicking and crying then so I needed to quietly get out of bed. I didn't want to wake Craig because I needed that cry to myself. Sure I'll talk to him about it when he wakes up but for now I need to try and calm myself down.

Anxiety is such a crazy thing. How it makes you dwell on such thoughts and you actually start to believe them. It honestly makes me feel like I'm actually going crazy sometimes. When in reality I know that chances of me dying while giving birth are pretty slim. I guess I won't shake this fear until I have the baby and we're both home, safe and sound.

So when you wake up during the wee hours of the morning and you're feeling anxious or scared- grab yourself some chocolate ice cream. It'll fix all of your problems!

Just kidding. That's my comfort eating talking. But that's a whole other story....

I hope you all have a beautiful day! :)

18 comments:

  1. Anxiety can be completely crippling, it's when you're no longer being engulfed by those thoughts that you suddenly feel like you're being silly, or making a fuss. It's definitely tricky! And just so you know.. I had spring rolls for breakfast this morning.. I'm not even pregnant! Oopsie daisies x

    VanessaVonJames | Fashion Blog

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    1. I know what you mean. After I had a good old, snotty sob to my boyfriend about it later on, I felt so embarrassed. It's definitely hard to deal with at times. Spring rolls sound so good right now! haha

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  2. I'm so pleased to have come across your blog, I adore the way you right! I don't suffer from anxiety myself but I do get anxious. I've no doubt you'll be bringing that baby home before you know it and hopefully you'll feel a little bit more at peace!

    PS. For breakfast this morning, I had a krispy kreme doughnut. IT WAS AMAZING.

    Musings & More

    Musings & More

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    1. Thanks so much Emily! I just can't wait to get it all over with. And omg I would LOVE a doughnut right now!! Definitely appropriate for breakfast :)

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  3. Amen. Sometimes you just need to not pull out your favorite comfort food to make you feel better. Don't worry, I am sure you will be an amazing mom (although I've never met you and just found your blog) But after reading some of the previous comments and looking around your blog I have faith in you =o)
    http://dreamofadventures.blogspot.com/

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    1. Aw thanks so much :) I know, hauling out the comfort food can be good but also really bad at the same time lol

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  4. Don't worry Renee. I'll pray for you and your baby :D Have a nice day!

    trulyfionaa.blogspot.com

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  5. Ahww I hope I could just hug you or you can call me out if you're feeling anxious. I know how b'tch can anxiety be, but I know you can do it. You're not going to die, silly. After all, when you see that baby come out into this world, everything will be worth it. I hope you're feeling well now.

    Love, Fads
    InstagramTwitter

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    1. Thanks Fads :) I'm feeling a little better at the moment but I think you're definitely right. When I see the baby, everything will be so much better :)

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  6. soo yummy !
    NEW BLOG ! please follow me : YOUNG BLOG

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  7. I've definitely had a few mornings where I wake up unbelievably early with my mind going at a million miles an hour. I usually just meditate to relax and go back to sleep but I like the idea of eating ice cream much more!

    http://thecourtneydiaries.com

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    1. I should definitely look into meditation!

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  8. I'm not surprised you're experiencing a whole rainbow of emotions right now - especially as you're a day past your due date! The good thing about fears is that they can be overcome, and holding your newborn baby in your arms will soon mark the end of this particular fear; the end of a fear and the start of a new life, how wonderful! :)

    aglassofice.com
    x

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    1. I'm only reading this now and the baby is already here and you've got everything spot on :) Such an amazing feeling!

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  9. Oh I'm so sorry the anxiety has ramped up but you're so so SO close!! It'll be amazing to see ten tiny fingers and toes, I hope you'll relax then. Don't ditch the ice cream habit though, that's a winner!
    Sending you stack of luck lovely lady
    M X

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    1. Thank you!! Everything went fine :) Reading this I kind of want a bowl right now! haha

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