January 2, 2017

5 Things To Quit | Fearing Change

In November I wrote about the first of five things to quit- trying to please everyone- and I think I've been doing quite well with it! I started speaking my mind more. I've started saying no to things I really don't want to do and don't feel as guilty about it as I used to. The second instalment in this series is about not fearing change. This is a big one for me. I hate change. I like my routines, I like knowing what's going to happen and I like things to stay the same.

But, I need to get over that.

I've realized I need to let change happen in order to grow. In some cases I need to let change happen in order to feel happy. For example; as sad as this is, I don't have any friends. At least none where I live. I've got a couple left back home in Cape Breton who I see maybe two times a year but I've made no effort in the last eight years to make new friends since moving away. I found out a girl I went to school with lives like ten minutes away from me now and we've talked over the computer and agreed to hang out sometime. This was months ago. Did I call her? No. Want to know why? Because I'm afraid. I've gone so long without making new friends that I'm afraid to now. I'm afraid to put myself out there and take the plunge. But that needs to change. And I need to let it.

I think the reason we fear change is because we never really know what we're going to get. Will this change be better for me or will it make life worse? Will I gain a new best friend or will she hate me and then I'll feel bad about myself? Its the fear of not knowing what will come out of these changes.

Maybe we can use that to our advantage though. Maybe instead we can turn that fear into excitement. Instead of thinking If I quit this job I may not find a new one or I might regret it- think- When I quit this job that makes me so unhappy, imagine what I might find next! I could find the job of my dreams! 

Craig and I have been seriously talking about a really big change for this year. It's been causing great stress and my anxiety acts up pretty much every time we talk about it but we need to. We haven't made a final decision just yet but ultimately, I know we need this change. As much as it scares me I know it needs to happen. And I'm going to choose to look at the pros of this change instead of the cons because really, there's always a bright side to everything. No matter how minuscule.



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